Circumstance, Comfort Zones, & Self-Care
Updated: Jul 2
Circumstances are conditions that push us out of our comfort zones. It is common for circumstances to modify our lives without affecting our essential nature. We may receive news from the doctor that our cholesterol is high or low, with recommendations to change our eating habits and get more exercise. Some may start by making small changes, but then slowly resort back to familiar ways. Some may take prescription medications without making any other lifestyle changes. And some may take those as serious orders and do a complete lifestyle overhaul, which does begin to change one's essential nature, or way of being. When it comes to the physical world, it's our common inclination to focus on the physical. If the house needs cleaning, we clean it. But what if we become frustrated with maintaining this fresh, new cleaning job? We don't clean as frequently, nor as thorough, do we? In our effort to find comfort, we become ok with things being ok. We find comfort in discomfort. We use, "I work a lot," or "cause kids," or "excuse the mess," to excuse ourselves from keeping order in our personal space.
But there is always an underlying issue that no amount of excuses or pills can magically fix. And that begins with how we view things. How we view ourselves, our relationships, our work ethic, our work, our children, our vehicles, and even our bodies is our mojo. It's what moves us to act. But we often don't notice when or how it starts, and one day a difficult to swallow bad news pill is given. What do we do? We blame someone else for our troubles:
Money- "I don't have enough money to eat healthy."
Spouse- "He won't listen."
Friends- "She's always talks badly about people."
Kids- "These kids are driving me nuts!"
Social Circles- "They're so cliquish. So I don't like participating."
Jobs- "It's such a negative environment; co-workers complain too much!" or "If only management would..."
Government- "He doesn't care about the people." "She's a moron!" "They just want to take my money."
Damage control mentality to a circumstance is a temporary solution. It mitigates the situation. Like allopathic approaches, it is essential for emergencies and when division, removal, and suppression is necessary. However it doesn't prevent circumstance.
To prevent or greatly reduce the chances of circumstance, holistic approaches must be applied. Holistic approaches treat the whole, instead of a part. If you are having difficulty in certain areas of life, looking at situation from every angle will help to see where you are missing something.
In the above examples of blame, a shift in perspective quickly changes how one will respond. Changing perspective:
Money- Making small changes I can afford, will improve health and energy. You can do more when you are refueled. When you are charged, you're IN charge.
Spouse- Why? Were they working or busy when you were talking? Did you ask for space for the conversation?
Friends- Redirect the conversation with questions that alter the conversations.
Kids- When's the last time you acted like a kid? Maybe it's overdue!
Social Circles- Find out what they're about and share your own story. If you want to have friends, make yourself friendly and learn to connect and relate, rather than needing others to see your viewpoint. New viewpoints challenge your own and help you strengthen what you have to say for yourself.
Jobs- When we don't share experiences, it can be difficult to find common ground. Find common ground, why they work for this company, for example, and you will find a way to connect and be relatable. There is no way to change anyone or any circumstance until you can first relate to your audience. They will automatically disconnect from you.
Government- When's the last time you influenced a large body of individuals?
Speaking of that last statement, you do influence a large body of individuals- at the cellular level! Here are editorial reviews of John Upledger's outstanding work:
“John Upledger has a unique way of blending science, the light touch of CranioSacral Therapy, and intuition into theory and practice that just may revolutionize medicine. This is required reading for all those adventurous souls seeking their paths on the journey of allopathic, holistic, or integrative caregiving.”
—Don Ash, P.T., CST-D
“Dr. Upledger has proposed a new paradigm for understanding the link between our minds and bodies. That connecting link is actual communication between the intellect and body organs, cells, and molecules. His paradigm involves understanding how this communication can lead to better health. His unique approach explains the powerful effect that cell talk can have on patients with cancer, heart disease, and other disturbances. This book will make you think about health and wellness in a completely new way.”
—Jon J. Kabara, Ph.D., Professor Emeritus, Michigan State University
“Each of us perceives ourselves as a single unified process that we refer to simply as ‘me.’ In reality, however, our bodies consist of many trillions of individual cells all acting symbiotically for the good of the whole. When there is conflict or miscommunication between these cells, disease is often the result…. Once cells and tissues are able to speak directly, they can easily guide the therapist and the patient on an efficient and effective journey back to health. I believe that Dr. Upledger’s approach represents the very best of the future of modern medicine.”
—Tim Hutton, Ph.D., L.M.P., CST-D
These are review of his book, Cell Talk: Transmitting Mind Into DNA
The body and mind are connected in ways we are just now on the forefront of finding applications for. There are several bodies of work on this subject and they have been floating around for quite some time, but with most new technologies and discoveries, there is a lag between the observation and cultural application. There's no need to wait for culture to catch up! If you are ready to revolutionize your way of being, then nothing is stopping you from changing your thinking.
As we find ourselves in a disarray of varying opinions, orders, reports and uncertainty, many feel something revolutionary is on its way. Social interaction. Business. Revaluing essential and non-essential. These are some of the contenders hinging upon major changes. Many will eventually resort back to familiar ways...until the next big circumstance is banging on their door.
But for those that are ready to take personal responsibility for how they do life:
I encourage observing your own thinking processes. From there you will immediately see where changes in perspective are necessary. Those changes automatically change what you do, why you do, how you do, and when you do. Self-care is intentional. When you begin to make your best self as the necessary self that functions in society, something very magical takes place!
Right now we are fighting a virus. Some believe it is real. Some do not. But the disarray of our society itself is a metaphorical display of the virus we can't see, shedding light on the larger virus of billions of opinions. So what kills a virus? Antibodies! And you can actually BE an antibody, if you choose. So check this out:
Antibodies are blood proteins the body produces to help the immune system fight some bacteria, viruses, and anything it perceives as a foreign invader. The word protein comes "from Greek prōteios "the first quality," from prōtos "first". To be an antibody, one only needs to 'get blood from a stone' by way of killing their perspective (drawing blood) or state of view with self-care. Self-care is acutalizing your best self, or first quality. A little deep, huh?
Let's break it down. By intentionally creating activities that recharge you, you are actively working on your best self. In best self mode, you are better able to make decisions and focus on solutions, rather than problems. This is not to say you need to change your perspective in correlation to others, but what can you do right now to change habitual thinking and habitual actions that no longer serve the state of your best self? In best self mode, the body and mind are sharp and efficient as a cohesive unit. The systems and cognition are optimized for healing. Think about that!
Better understanding of how the body works and the mind's connection to it overall, allows growth potential in what it is capable of doing as a whole. If you feel better mentally, you feel better physically. If you feel better physically, you feel better mentally. There is no separation. In this state gratitude physiologically improves the immune system. So metaphorically acting as an antibody with your mental cognition, actualizes immune improvement physically. And that is what a metaphor does in the meta dimension- it carries you experientially in a vertical direction. There is so much to this experience we have yet to uncover and connect, but don't lose heart. You are much more powerful than you realize!
I'm currently not giving massages, just taking this moment to reflect and adjust, as many of you are too. I can't facilitate healing with the sense of touch at the moment, so I hope this touches your heart. If you need anything, feel free to reach out. Like my Facebook page for updates and news on the body-mind connection and studies of gratitude and its effect on the immune system.